Sick

I am sick of living my life based on people's expectations. I am sick of thinking too much on what people think of me. I am sick of making myself suffer because I want to make a good impression. For example, in work, sick leave is given for a reason, so who cares if I utilise them once a month? Who gives a shit if I don't take them at all? I'm always punctual to work but thinking of it, am I stupid to follow by the rule if everyone else is not doing the same? Why do I need to work hard to impress others when I am not enjoying what I do? Why do I need to care if people doesn't know me by name even after I've done them a favour? Why do I care so much of taking care other people's feeling? Just so sick of it. Wish I can run far far away and live the life I want. I want to be selfish. I want to be carefree. Can I?